


Religious Observance

by songs_of_the_moon



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Atheist Character, Confusion, Gen, International Talk Like A Pirate Day, Pastafarianism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-19
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-04-21 13:58:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4831631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/songs_of_the_moon/pseuds/songs_of_the_moon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carlos celebrates a religious holiday.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Religious Observance

"Arr, Captain, ye be late!"

"Uh, sorry?" Carlos says, processing. He didn't think he was late, but in a town where none of the clocks are real, it's hard to tell. Michelle, an undergrad wearing a striped shirt and several gaudy gold bangles, rolls her eyes.

"Did you, like, forget the date?" she asks, returning to her usual speech pattern. "You were totally excited about this last week."

The date. . . ? Carlos checks his phone, which informs him that it's the nineteenth. "Oh! It's Talk Like A Pirate Day, isn't it?"

"No, I'm just wearing the ugliest hat ever created because it's the new style," puts in Jason, without looking up from his laptop. Sure enough, a tricorner hat with a sloppy skull and crossbones painted on the front is perched precariously on the back of his head.

"Well, maybe in Night Vale." Carlos shrugs. Jason laughs hard enough that his hat falls off.

* * *

 

_> Ahoy, me beauty. How fares ye?_

Cecil frowns at the text. It says it's from Carlos, but Cecil double-checks the number just to be sure. The Faceless Old Woman has, in the past, re-arranged his contacts, but it doesn't look like that's the case this time. (Last time, he spent several minutes texting Janice and wondering why Old Woman Josie wanted to talk about My Little Pony.)

_> I'm faring well. How about you? Are you feeling ok?_

It's nearly ten minutes before Carlos answers. This isn't unusual, as he often gets engrossed in his work and/or distracted by saving the town and/or world, but Cecil worries anyway.

_> I be hale and hearty! I take it ye be concerned over me new way o' speech?_

Oh, thank the beams he realizes that something's wrong. Cecil allows himself to relax a little. If Carlos is cognizant of the fact that his speech is out of the ordinary, it probably hasn't progressed enough to be irreversible.

_> Not. . .concerned. Troubled._

The wait this time is much shorter.

_> I'm sorry, hon. I didn't mean to worry you. It's just something silly me and my team are doing._

Cecil resists the urge to respond with  _my team and I_. _  
_

_> Are you sure? Infections like this can be insidious._

_> It's not an infection, we're celebrating International Talk Like A Pirate Day. I guess you don't have it in Night Vale?_

Oh. Oh!

_> I didn't realize you were observant! We have so few Pastafarians in Night Vale, it's easy to lose track of your holidays. But that's no excuse! I apologize for not knowing this about you before. _

"I called his religious observance an infection!" Cecil says to the (mostly) empty apartment. "Oh, I feel like such a cad." His phone buzzes before he can continue with more self-recrimination.

_> Don't feel bad, I don't talk about it much. My family doesn't even know I'm not Catholic anymore._

Cecil isn't sure what a 'Catholic' is, but he's certain there will be a more tactful time to ask. Well, not  _certain_ , because nothing's certain, but reasonably sure.

_> You don't have to go back to not talking like a pirate on my account! Would it be rude of me to join, or rude of me not to?_

_> You don't have to if you don't want to, but it might be fun if you did._

_> Oh, that sounds wonderful! I'm so grateful to be included in your religious traditions, Carlos._

* * *

"Religious traditions?" Carlos reads aloud.

"Be there a problem with yer landlubbin' mate, Captain?" Michelle asks.

"I think. . . ." Carlos runs a hand over his hair. "I think, in Night Vale, Pastafarianism is, um, a real religion."

The other scientists stare at him. Michelle manages, "Really?" The others just gawk.

"Uh huh."

He and Cecil are going to have to have a long talk.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Here, have some word vomit I spewed when I realized it was International Talk Like A Pirate Day. 
> 
> If you go to Krispy Kreme and, well, talk like a pirate, they'll give you a free doughnut. They'll give you a dozen if you dress like one! (Finally, a use for those tacky bangles my sister gave me.)
> 
> (Also, I know that ITLAP Day isn't _really_ a Pastafarian holiday, but pirates are seen as the first Pastafarians. So, you know. It works.)


End file.
